Gargantuan fluffy puppies and footballers...not something you see every day!
Tighten your jockstraps...because, Diamantino is one-of-a-kind and one-helluva-ride. And...one great big piss-take on the beautiful game!
John Lennon once said that The Beatles were bigger than Jesus Christ...if he hadn't delivered a rather hasty and emphatic apology..his & Co's careers might have irreversibly slumped. How times have changed!
Football is the new religion [well, to be honest, in modern times...it has always been more popular and evoked more passion than that stuffy old religious guff]. This [usually male] adoration for an over-paid, ball-kicking [male] goon has always been a cause of great amusement and confusion [to gay men]. Straight men lusting over a bunch of men in shorts...if they had the opportunity...how many do you think would allow [and love] being buggered by their ball-kicking idols...it's all so damn gay!
And...so is this film! Well, not entirely...this footballer swings both ways in the 'biblical sense'...because, he's a goddamn virgin! Hysterical.
Carloto Cotta does a ball-kicking-beauty-with-no-brains to a tee...he's a fairy-tale Prince Charming, complete with two evil money-grabbing-cum-laundering sisters. He's trusting and loving and caring and adorably stupid. He makes hearts melt and straight willies stiff!
Gabriel Abrantes & Daniel Schmidt have thrown [absolute] madness at the screen...and, the clever thing is...it's both scalding and scathing...nothing quite like an insult when it's all packaged with glitter and bows.
Yes...it - most definitely - will go over the ball-kicking fans' heads...but, by god, did these filmmakers take aim? They sure did...and shot it straight right into the back of the net!
Brilliant...and, chilling [even with fluffy puppies]!
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Diamantino, the world's premiere soccer star loses his special touch and ends his career in disgrace. Searching for a new purpose, the international icon sets on a delirious odyssey where he confronts neo-fascism, the refugee crisis, genetic modification, and the hunt for the source of genius.